Archive for the Inspirational Category

Update!!!!

Joel Christopher Remendaban, aka The Master List Builder is the BIGGEST Crap Shit Scammer I’ve ever met! He came, pitched his thing, took people’s money, cheated my money, never delivered anything worthy and disappeared with the money, leaving a number of people jaded and lost. This is hard earned money! Some even got into debts because of his cheating scam.

I’m deleting this post because in my opinion, he does not deserve any good publicity.

Beware of him! Go ahead and do a Google search on "Joel Christopher Scam". I bet you’ll find something other than what I’m writing.

For the times when we need a little encouragement

Enjoy.

Thought I wanted to talk about this.

I was putting some thought into this question and came up with the following conclusion.

Since our subconscious mind is most active right before we wake up and also that is the time when we haven’t got caught up by the day yet, so I concluded that the best time is still just before we wake up… when we are still caught up in that thin line between the dream world and our physical world.

Why? Cos our subconscious has got many layers, from alpha to theta state and Carl Jung even suggested that at the deepest level of our subconscious is that level called the super-consciousness or collective consciousness. This is that consciousness that we ALL share with the universe.

Ralph Waldo Emerson said: “When one makes a decision, the Universe conspires to make it happen.” The subconscious, being the bridge to the super-conscious therefore ‘carries’ our thoughts of manifestation into the super-conscious, by creating a “pinging” effect in the collective consciousness, aligning the universe in a perfection of “events” or “situations”, that is aligned to our original thought that was put forth as a decision or visualization or affirmation, by our conscious mind.

Therefore, perhaps the best time to practice the Law of Attraction is that time when we are “tuned in” in between our subconscious and conscious states. So that our conscious mind, without the clutter of the physical world we live in, sends a clear intent / decision to our subconscious, thereby channeling it to the super-consciousness aka the Universe.

The caution here is still…. be clear about your decision… cos if we keep changing our minds, those “pings” keep changing and a momentum doesn’t get built up due to shifting decisions. Remember, the Universe gives you what you ask for, all the time, springing forth our deepest expression of our ‘self’.

Hmmmm…… guess I just opened a can of worms here with that last statement cos there is something deeper that I gotta discuss too, called ‘The Sponsoring Thought’. Also known as “The thought behind the thought”. Cos if our sponsoring thought is not aligned to our conscious thought, it is tough to manifest our true desire. That sponsoring thought could be a belief or an emotion about ourselves, most of the time it is being implanted in our psyche from a very young age. And these things govern our daily actions and feelings, influencing our daily creation or re-creation of ourselves. Guess I’ll have to talk about that another time. Your comments are welcomed.

It’s been 2 weeks since my last post and I promise to make this a good one. It is about Self-Esteem. Something that many people, including myself, struggle with. The basic question here being: “When does tolerance become unhealthy? When does a person say enough is enough?” Hope you find it useful.

Qn: Why do perfectly noble, normal, well-intentioned people get bullied? What gives?

These are people who go about their daily lives seeking to be good, to do good and to genuinely make a difference, to give value, earn an honest living, do no harm, be kind to animals kind of people….. you get my drift.

Of course I can go about the Karma route and explain it in a Spiritual sense of cause and effect. I can even talk about it through a Law of Attraction sense. However, today I’m going to take a purely scientific, psychological approach to discuss this topic.

Is it really about family background and upbringing, as Freud suggests? Or is it a chain reaction of things that happen to a person, causing him / her to “absorb” more and more of the “S*#t” people dump, letting others trample upon them like a doormat, sometimes even to the point of imploding…. sometimes exploding? (metaphorically speaking of course). Ultimately, it causes a lot of harm to the individual, physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. We can see an array of physical manifestation as a result. Stuff like broken relationships, eating disorders, irritable bowel syndrome, depression, mental disorders, eczema etc, all manifestations of ‘taking in’ too much.

Let me give you an example. I have a friend who believes in reciprocity. Do good first and then good will come back in return. He has an unconditional positive regard towards others and genuinely looks for the good in other people. He has a forgiving nature and understands that people behave the way they do because they are heavy laden with their own baggage. But here’s what I observed, people take advantage of him and I’ve seen him being bullied in his workplace where he gets promised something and later the person who gave the promise does not fulfill it. In one of the portfolio his team was handling, I know that he’s doing most of the work but in the end, someone else takes over the credit and he does not even protest. I’ve even seen him get an oppressive tongue-lashing from a superior and he didn’t even stand up for himself. (BTW, I was a colleague of his). I saw him took this kind of treatment for 2 years and every time one of us colleagues asks him why is he allowing such people to take advantage of him, he usually has an excuse to justify their behaviour or he says that he contributed to the problem in the first place.

So one day, after I got trained as a counsellor, I sat down with him and had a counselling session and thankfully he was willing. What he revealed to me was not surprising. He was frustrated and angry with himself, even depressive, having irritable bowel syndrome, insomnia and eczema. However, he said he just couldn’t help himself. He knows that he’s feeling bad and miserable but cannot bring himself to stand up for himself. He’s got a believe system that says “Nice guys don’t get angry and I’m a nice guy”, “Harmony is maintained when no conflicts arise so don’t start conflicts.” There are also some disempowering spiritual beliefs of his that I can’t mention. Anyway, I was curious about where did he these acquire such belief systems and started asking him about his childhood and his relationship with his parents. To cut the story short, he was very much abused by his father (physically and emotionally) as a kid and was made to feel that when bad things happen, it is his fault and he was a lousy person if he cannot “do things right” (right being subjected to his father’s opinion). With that kind of low self-worth that was implanted within his psyche, he went on with life getting bullied even outside the home, in school and even socially. That was his pattern, getting bullied is normal!!??!!

Today, through many sessions of counselling therapy and motivational seminars, he has become more balanced a person. I still see certain times when he gets bullied and revert back to old patterns but I celebrate his progress. Compared to the man of the past, he’s much better now, able to assert himself when necessary.

Though I’m just using my friend as an example here, I know that many of you can empathise with his story as many of you have experienced such things in one way or another. Perhaps there is some programming that was implanted in you previously that cause you to be who you are today.

In my opinion, a low self-esteem is accumulated through the years, starting from childhood. There is always a point when a person is in the right time and situation to allow massive change to happen. Metaphorically speaking, that is the time when the “rubber band snaps”, when the person says: “I’m ready for change.” Certain questions help people get to this stage, questions like: ” Should you continue this pattern, how is it going to affect you and your loved ones?”, “Are you tired of being bullied and treated like a doormat?”and “It must feel very painful to be in your position, doesn’t it?” If you find it difficult to pull through and come to a decision, know that usually for something to improve, a little tension and discomfort is necessary.

Should you be in such a situation, my encouragement to you is to first recognise that there is some kind of a pattern within you. Accept, forgive and know that such patterns can be changed. Know that with help, you can live life with confidence, assurance and a healthy self-esteem. Seek therapy when needed. Healing can happen in a heartbeat.

In my following posts, I’ll be talking about the 8 stages of life, the 8 kinds of love required during those 8 stages and what are the crucial things that need to be fulfilled at each stage, in order for you to be a whole person.

Meanwhile, should you have comments about this post, do share them so that readers can benefit.

I think I was around 18 years old when I heard a sermon about words having power.

When I watched “The Secret” again just recently, this thought of “Words Have Power” kept repeating in my head and I started observing people again…. as usual. This time I really wanted to listen to the words that people choose and observe what kind of emotions they are feeling… of course, me being the analytical person that I am, I then try to deduce what kind of mind-frame that person is living in, manifesting what kind of life. The question that I ask myself through these observations are then… How powerful are words, in relation to manifested reality? What does it take for people to be aware this cause-effect and choose to change something as simple as their words… or is it really that simple?

There is an example that I would like to share today:

A man who is talking to a friend over coffee. His friend asked: “How has our day been?” and the answer was terrible! It went along the lines of “That STUPID client of mine… DAMN troublesome. Cannot make a simple decision… so KIASEE (aka cowardly)! Waste my time. No Balls! ….. He went on and on and I was feeling so irritated by the negative vibes, I changed table….. but here’s the observation. In a short span of 15 mins, 3 other phone calls came in for this man and all of them were “bad”. One was about a deal that just got stolen by another agent, one was from an unhappy client asking for a refund and another one sounded like it was his wife on the other line and he was trying to shove her away by giving justifications that he was on a phone call. I saw this and I thought to myself: “I can’t imagine the kind of self talk that is happening in his mind on a daily basis. He must be suffering a great deal.” As for his friend, It seemed like he was being really nice to be a listening ear but I could see that he was feeling uneasy. I wonder what is his relationship with his wife like? If only this man could realise that his words are causing him anguish and possibly attracting more negativity and unhappiness in his life.

I’ve got a friend who regularly uses the word “Sorry”, almost in every conversation and talks a lot about how his boss treating him like a doormat. Is that word “Sorry” feeding the insecurity?

Another friend keeps using the word “Stressed” and constantly falls sick. What’s the connection there?

I’ve got another friend who uses the word “Busy” all the time but doesn’t seem to be able to get her job done on time. Always asking for extension of deadline.

On a positive light, I also got a friend who always says he’s GREAT and he says it with gusto! He has probably one of the most loving couple relationships I’ve ever seen.

So, do you think words have power?

In my humble opinion, words HAVE power. They are like the constant seeds that are being sown daily, growing into the harvest that we’ll have to reap one day. It affects every part of a person’s life. Emotionally, Mentally, Spiritually and Physically. Words are the medium in which we send our thoughts out into the universe, attracting back the same vibrations that are sent. My encouragement to you is to constantly be aware of the words that you use, cos words come forth from your thoughts, interpretations and belief systems, which inevitably shape or reinforce who you are. It becomes a self expression of who you are, thereby shaping the “reality” that you live in. It is so simple and yet powerful.

Watch your words my friend, choose them wisely, make it a habit. They could shape and nurture, they could also destroy. Choose healthy words. My wish for you is for you to have a happy, fulfilling life, with wonderful relationships.

I’ve got a free report from the Hendricks Institute entitled “How to Change Your Life with a Single Word”. It is in my free ebooks section. You might want to get a copy. Please enter your name and email on right sidebar and you’ll be given a link to that page. Other goodies there too.